Mother's Day

Todd had to fly out to Winnipeg this Mother's Day so I got to spend the day alone with these 4 rugrats.  They were all so cute and I love being their mom.  I know we have our days when it's just too much but being a mom is the greatest thing in the world.  I have a mom who I adore and who has taught me so much about patience, hard work and unconditional love.  I have 4 amazing children who love me so much and who I would do anything for.  We have so much fun together and the older they get the more I love them.  Everyday I love these kids more and more.  I am so blessed to be their mom. 

Thanks Tays

I found this in Tayson's end of year binder.  Thanks a lot buddy! 

It says: My dad plays as much as possible, sisters younger baby Sophie a devil.  Other Claire bossy.  Luke playful.  My mom is oldest in my family.

Mother's Day

 This year wasn't a typical Mother's day for me.  It started at 2:00 am with Sophie throwing up. 

Then Todd had to fly out early so it was just me and the kiddos.  They all gave me their awesome school made pictures and presents.

And they decorated the wall for me.

Tayson even put a K and Missouri on the wall for me

Luke made lunch for everyone

I am one lucky girl to have these 4 kids call me mom.  

Sophie made me an awesome necklace and wanted me to wear it all day....it was too itchy so it only lasted a few minutes.

Then I got to go to my parent's house for dinner and celebrate with my awesome mama.  I love living so close to my mom and I really love being her daughter.  She is the ultimate example of motherhood to me.  She has endless energy and is completely selfless.  No wonder the Lord trusted her with 10 kids.

Mother's Day Program

The hole

Tayson came home with a small hole in his coat and was sure he would have to throw it away.  Since of course I couldn't fix it.  Well I totally proved him wrong and did a fancy hand stitch to close that baby up.  Yep I'm a real homemaker!  Ha.

"I no need help"

Sophie will NOT let me help her do anything. She is fiercely independent but too small to actually do everything she wants to do. She wouldn't let me help her get dressed this morning. She picked out her 2T shirt and tried putting in on feet first and couldn't get it past her belly. When I tried to help and tell her it goes over her head she said "I no need help" then put it on right. Then she picked out stripped leggings and put them on. I tried explaining to her that it didn't match and could we change her (too small) shirt. "No I love iceream". I asked her if I could comb her hair and put it in a ponytail and there was no way she was going to let me so I didn't fight it. Then she decided to pack her new backpack to take to Jeannie's house. Here is what I found in multiple pockets: swim suit bottoms, Rapunzel doll, granola bar, and a book. Then we got in the car to leave and she wouldn't let me buckle her she "no need help" so I sat there for several extra minutes while she fought with the darn thing. I know in the long run I'll be so happy for her independent nature but I sure don't love it right now. After reading this please don't judge me for her appearance in public. It's not from a lack of trying!

p.s. Claire also got herself completely ready this morning (picked out her own outfit, put in her headband and packed her lunch box and backpack).

Happy Mother's Day

I love the handmade things my kids make me at school. Todd took the boys shopping with him and they bought me a new outfit at Nordstroms (which I love) and the boys wrapped up all their stuff from school too. It was fun opening everything. If you look close at the picture there is a pink booklet with "Fiesta" on it. I asked Luke if that was for the Cinco de Mayo but he assured me he made it for Mother's Day. Then on Monday when I was cleaning out his backpack before school I found a cute pink coupon book and asked him if that was what he meant to give me and he said "oh yea...that's what I made you". It was classic.


From Tayson:




Translation:
The outfit she wears the most is: running outfit
If I had a million dollars, I would buy my mom: the best set of running clothz
I love my mom the best when she: takes me to get icecream
My mom is as tall as a: cloud, and as soft as a: dog
I love my mom the most because she: cares for me
My mom's favorite thing to cook is: Spigitie and I think it is awesome
When my mom finishes her work she likes to: run
I love my mom best when she: let's me stay up.
I 'bug' my mom the most when I: want somting


From Luke:
Translation: Recipie
Cooks (the steak) on barbeque half hour on barbeque then eat it


Translation:
M - mom
O - out of this world
T - teacher
H - happy
E - exciting
R - Relly fun
My mom's the greatest because: she lets me sleep on the couch


Translation:
My mom is special because: she takes me to school. She loves me.
I like it when my Mom: makes dinner.
My mom can do many things! I think she's best at: her work.
My mom has a pretty smile! I like to make her smile by: telling jokes.
My mom is as pretty as a: flower
My mom is smart! She even knows: how to drive.


Well I must say I am the luckiest mom around to have the kids I have. I think it's hilarious that all Tayson talks about is my running. At least Luke said I'm as pretty as a flower unlike being as soft as a dog. I love being a mom. Some days it's really hard work and it takes all of my energy to keep going and take care of my kids. I love having all 4 of them so close together because of how much fun they have together but it is definitely not easy to have them all so close. Mother's day itself wasn't the best day for me. Todd got sick and had to leave church minutes after we sat down so I had all the kids alone at church. He had to take the car home so I was going to walk home but it was raining so we had to bum a ride from Steve. Then I didn't have anyone to pamper me at dinner at my parent's house. I kept trying to find the silver lining but I just couldn't make myself have a great day while it was going on. The thing about Mother's day is that it's just a day. Every single day I get hugs and kisses from my kids, they tell me they love me, they thank me for making them dinner (even when it's mac-n-cheese), they run to me excited when I get home from work. I love being a mom and I wouldn't change it for anything!!

Something just for me

This morning I saw this posted on a friends blog and feel like this is something I really needed to hear.

8 "Resolutions" Every Mom Should Make
1. I will embrace the fact that I am not perfect.
2. I will get down on the floor and play with my child(ren) every day.
3. I will take care of my body.
4. I will learn to love the chaos.
5. I will make family dinner a priority.
6. I will focus a little more on my marriage.
7. I will make time for my friends.
8. I will remind myself daily that time with my children is precious.

My life is completely overwhelming right now - work has been crazy busy, Todd is gone 4 days a week, the kids are in school, pre-school, dance, and cub scouts, Young Women's is a very time consuming calling and I have rededicated myself to getting my butt out of bed and working out 5 days a week. Last night I posted this on my facebook :

Tired so tired. Some days I just want to stop and enjoy things like my kids, the fall weather, my food and a good book. Maybe tomorrow. Sigh.

Also a few weeks ago in General Conference Pres. Uchtdorf spoke on simplifying our lives - I loved his talk but I just don't know what more I can simplify at this point. All I have left is my job, my kids, my calling and exercise. I never have time to watch TV and I fight to stay awake so I can read. Maybe instead of simplifying I should just take on the motto "this too shall pass" or one I taught in YW last week "I can do hard things".

Confessions of a Mormon Mom

It all started this weekend with a brand new suit for Tayson that needed to be hemmed. My MIL said she would do it for me if I would just grab a needle and thread.....ummm I don't have any. What? You might ask how I mend things. I don't. Either we wear them with holes, get rid of them or I pay someone to fix it for me. Pathetic I know. But really it's just not something I can do. So there you have it confession #1 - I can't sew.

Confession #2 - I can't make homemade bread. I consider anything that comes out of my oven "homemade". Yep, if I warm up frozen rolls in the oven or make Pillsbury cinnamon rolls or bake pre-made cookie dough it's homemade. I agree it isn't made from scratch but it is still warm out of the oven and I did have to exert effort to bake it. I don't think I have ever even attempted to make bread from scratch or a cake. I did have a bread maker that I would put the ingredients in and hit start. But that is as close at it comes from me. I do make cookies and other things from scratch when I have time, but really I don't have a lot of time or patience or love for baking.

Confession #3 - I'm not good at fixing little girls hair. I have about 3 hair-do's that I can pull off. I haven't been able to successfully braid their hair or give them princess up-dos. If you have seen Sophie you know her hair is wild and crazy and 90% of the time it's in her face. I really should spend more time making my daughters look BEAutiful but it's really not a talent I possess.

Those are the big ones I can think of right now. I try to do my best to be a good mom and a good Mormon, but there are just a few things on the job description that I haven't mastered yet. Don't get me wrong there are many talents I do possess....let me know if you need a training program written up, a book read fast, a web page built or someone to go out to eat and shopping with you!

Happy Mother's Day To Me

This year Mother's Day was awesome. Todd made me go back to bed so he and kids could make me breakfast. They made German pancakes and they were delicious (Claire even had seconds which NEVER happens). The boys were so proud of themselves for doing the dishes too. Now I know they can do it and I'll make sure they help out more often. Todd bought me a really cute outfit (he's got great taste). Todd had to fly out after church. Sad. But that night for dinner the boys did everything and it was a great day!

Luke brought home a flower from school and the following conversation took place:

Luke: Here mom this is for you.
Me: Thank you. Why did you bring that home? (yes I was fishing for a compliment)
Luke: Because my teacher told me too.

Tayson made this for me:



Translation:
M: movies, memories, mom
O: olives
T: TV (and he can't remember the what the other one was)
H: happy, hug, hearts
E: eggs, eat, emeralds
R: rubies, rings, run

I love that in this one he says "to Kathy". I think it's hilarious that he said "I like it when you make money" I guess I don't need to feel guilty for leaving him everyday because he likes it.

Here's how the morning went

Well first let me give a bit of background information. Tayson had to have his book report turned in on the 27th. So on the 26th he finished reading his book (Diary of a Wimpy Kid II) and wanted to do a video scene from the book (his teacher is so much fun). So Meggan helped him figure out what to do and he, Luke and Claire made a video of the talent show (you can watch it here). After I put the kids to bed I was going to burn it to a DVD for him to take to school the next morning. This took 4 DVD's (2 of which I had to borrow from Steve) to get it so the kids didn't sound like Chipmunks. It caused lots of extra stress (yes I did smack my laptop at one point) but it was finally done so I put it out on the counter so I wouldn't forget in the craziness of the morning.

Back to how the morning went.....

So I had to teach spin then I knew I had an 8:00 am conference call with our marketing staff in Europe so I was very rushed to get ready. I kept thinking to myself...somethings gotta give either work, kids or beauty at this point because I didn't know how it was all going to happen. Somehow I managed to get ready by about 7:50 and hurried to get the kids breakfast. I poured the cereal, we said prayers and even got a few minutes of scriptures in. Then it was 8:00 and today of all days I had to lead the call. Usually I get on and listen while I'm doing things and when it's my turn to do my update walk in another room for 2-5 minutes. Not today I had to talk 90% of the time. So I'm talking, pointing at the kids what to do, giving them dirty looks to tell them when they weren't doing what they should be, unloading the dishwasher, etc. All the while frantically searching for the DVD which I somehow managed to lose. Let's not forget Sophie running around naked saying "poopy" so I kept trying to get her to sit on the potty and even muted my phone at one point and asked Claire to take her to the potty. Nice. I still can't find the DVD and it's 8:08 (they are supposed to leave for the bus at 8:05) so I hurry and write a note to his teacher that he did it and I lost it and will bring it in later then rush the boys out the door telling them to run to the bus. I finished my call around 8:20 and call my dad to see if he has any DVD-R's since I used all of the ones in my house last night and really don't want to go to Wal-Mart. Luckily he did and he was on his way out anyway so he dropped it by. He walked in to see me holding naked Sophie on my hip, with make up and hair done but still in my bathrobe and says "do you need help?". Not much he could do at that point besides what he had already done to help. Thanks dad that DVD saved me A LOT of time. So I set up my laptop to burn another copy and go to get dressed. I had to fight Sophie off the laptop 4 times during the burning process. Then about 30 seconds before the DVD finishes Claire walks in the room holding the other DVD and says "I found it in my room". What???? How did it get in there? She blamed Sophie - but I'm pretty sure that the night before when she was up during one of her nightly walks around the house before she decided she was finally tired enough to go to sleep she picked it up. Once I finished getting ready and Meggan got there at 8:30 I ran the DVD to Tayson's class and then off to work. Quite a morning. Thank goodness most mornings aren't like that.

I posted something on Facebook about how overwhelmed I felt while I was driving to work (yes I facebooked while driving....SOOOOOO bad!) That night one of my awesome neighbors made me dinner to help with the stress. It was so awesome. I was back to normal by the time I got home from work that day and could have done it. But it was so nice to not have to rush through making dinner for the kids. We just sat down together and enjoyed a few minutes of family time.

Yesterday...

was a bad day for me.

I don't know why I can't keep it together. Meggan needed to leave early and since I've been at work so much this week I thought it would be great to spend some extra time with the kids. I don't know how stay-at-home mom's do it. I had to do homework and reading with Tayson, get 5 cups of juice, clean up 3 potty accidents, plunge the toilet, finish washing the sheets, make the bed, cook dinner, answer emails from work, feed the kids, read scriptures and get them ready for bed. I was so worn out and tired I took a hot bath and got in bed as soon as I put the kids down. I easily could have fallen asleep before them but I was so excited that Todd was coming home I waited up. By the time Todd got home (a little after 9:00) 3 of the 4 kids were in my bedroom and I didn't care enough at that point to punish them for getting out of bed. Claire cuddled up in bed with me, Tayson was texting Todd and Luke was just in there bugging Tayson. I honestly just had to turn off.

The thing that really gets to me is that I lose it with my kids. I am embarrassed to admit how many times I raised my voice, completely yelled, swore and cried within a few hours. My family means more to me than anything in the world and some days I yell at them more than I laugh with them. I don't want to be like that but I can't figure out how to be better. Sometimes I just feel sorry for myself and think I have the hardest life...then I look around and realize I have it all and I should stop complaining and start being grateful. I know I need to try harder and do better as a mom - the last conference was all about that and I need to take it to heart. I just don't know how to do it.

Just some thoughts

Friends. I have amazing friends. Some of them I've known for a very long time, others a short while. I feel that each of my friends have changed my life in some way (all good of course). But the other day Todd and I were talking about "best friends" and really I am one of those people who has lots of friends but not really that 1 person I always go to. I guess I'm just not the kind to have a small close group of friends. Todd said he said something about this a year or so ago (I think it was when I was prego with Sophie) and apparently it didn't go over well and hurt my feelings. But I don't think it's a bad thing (now that I'm not hormonal) I just think it's how I roll. Even when I look back at high school I was the same way. Really my best friend is Todd and I've always had my siblings as my closest friends (then and now). A funny thing that happened during the conversation was that when we were talking about it Luke said "mom you have lots of close friends and started naming all of our neighbors". Such a funny and literal kid.

The easy life. I was thinking the other day that I am really in the easy part of life right now. My kids are sweet, they love me, I don't worry everyday about them being exposed to drugs, sex or things like that. I'm sure that in a few years when all 4 of them are teenagers I'll be worried and stressed wondering if I have taught them right from wrong and been a good enough example to them. But right now no matter how exhausting my 4 little kids are they sure are easy to please and they love me so much. I don't want to think about a time when they won't come running to me when they need a kiss or come crawl in bed with me if they have a bad dream. I'm going to enjoy this time in my life instead of complain about having 4 kids under 8 years old.

What is about 7 miles? For some reason 7 is the breaking point for me. I'm fine until I hit this mileage then my body revolts. We ran 7 this morning (it was 21 degrees and dark - yuck) and since I got home my poor gut has killed me. It keeps cramping and gurgling and revolting. For some reason this happens at 7 miles and anything above. Last year I solved this problem with LOTS of water and Gatorade while running. I am just not quite ready to break out the running belt yet.

Motherhood

Yesterday I spent the day reading this blog about Bronson and I cried and cried. I don't know Sara very well (we have mutual friends and I see her at the gym). I can't stop thinking about her family and her sweet baby boy (who is 3 months younger than Sophie). She has changed my life and I know that because of her I want to be a better mother.

Yesterday Tayson went home from school early and last night about an hour after he went to bed he came into my room with his Star Wars blanket and a very sad look on his face. He hurt so bad and I told him to climb in bed with me. He cuddled up next to me, laid his head on my chest and I put my cheek on the top of his head and just held him until he fell asleep. The whole time I just kept thinking about how big he is now and how much I love him and how grateful I am that I have him. Rather than be upset about how late it was (I mean it was past 10pm...) and how tired I would be in the morning I just wanted to hold him. Soon he will be too old to want to cuddle with me and my back scratching and kissing might not make everything better but for now I'm going to appreciate the time I have to still be his mommy.

Something to make me smile

I was looking at the pictures on my phone and I saw this picture. Totally made me smile. This was a Saturday when Todd had stayed up late the night before so I decided to take all 4 kids to the grocery store with me. It was snowing outside so they all wanted to get bundled up in boots, coats, hats and gloves. I thought they were so cute I snapped a quick picture.

I also remember how bad shopping with all 4 of them was that day. I put the girls in one race car shopping cart and Luke in another race car cart that Tayson was pushing. We ran into things, the kids yelled a lot, I bought way more than I meant to because they kept things in the cart (especially Tayson). By the end of shopping I finally made Luke get out of the cart when I was checking out and go stand by the wall where he couldn't touch anyone. At that point the checker said "so what do you think works the best with kids? time outs? spanks?" I am pretty sure I just looked at him like "really you think I know....can you see my kids right now?" but I answered "well it really depends on the kid and the age."

I'm so glad that I can look back at this picture and smile and remember how funny my kiddos were that morning before we went shopping.

You've got to be kidding

Today was quite a day. It was so bad it's simply laughable. I've been working a huge project at work for the past few months. We completely redesigned our US website and it has been quite an undertaking. I've had to work long hours late into the night for the past few weeks. Then Todd got a new job and is in California for training. He'll spend 2 days at home over a 3 week period (only 8 more days until he's home). On top of the website redesign this week is our global convention at work and since we're celebrating 25 years it has been huge and there have been lots and lots of extra projects.

So Today was the big launch at 10:00 am. At 8:20 this morning Claire threw up. She begged me to stay home with her today but that was just impossible. Meggan said it was quite a day and she was sick all day. Around 3:30 pm I noticed my right hand was achy and that my arm was red and swollen where my burn is (I burned my arm on the minivan exhaust last Saturday reaching under the car for a run away tissue). I called the doctor's office and hurried over there to find out that I have cellulitis.

The best part is that for 10 years I've been making fun of Todd since he's had it 4 times. Twice since we've been married. I'd never even heard of cellulitis until I met him and he was actually hospitalized for it when he was a kid. When the doctor told me what it was I just laughed. When I explained to him that I deserved to have this because of all my teasing he laughed along with me.

It has been quite a rollercoaster of events in the house. I guess when it rains it pours. At least I know that it's raining blessings on me too.

Good Morning

Not really. This morning was CRAZY! Todd is out of town for work all week (Sunday night - Friday night) so I'm single mom this week. Yesterday was great. Sophie threw up a few times during the night but the kids slept good and the morning routine was no problem. I figured if I could make it through puke with no issues the rest of the week shouldn't be too bad. Then this morning happened.

I got up and taught spin at 6:00 am then hurried home to get myself and the boys ready by 8:00. Tayson and Luke were both awake and dressed when I got home at 7. Tayson was all upset that he couldn't get World of Warcraft to load and he wanted to know if he could wake up Timmy for his password. I told him that it was Tuesday so WoW is down and to play something else. He argued with me for a good 5 minutes that it wasn't Tuesday it was Thursday. Finally he gave up and went and played something else. I hurried and took a quick shower and then I heard Sophie crying. She had completely peed out of her pj's so I got her all dressed and even fixed her hair. Then hurried and went in to fix my hair. At 7:50 I got the boys off the computer for breakfast. I had just gotten them to sit down with their captain crunch when Claire woke up so I started to get her breakfast too. Then Tayson said "who pooped? it smells soooooo disgusting!" I checked Sophie then Claire and realized that Claire had pooped a very long time ago and slept in it....oh my gosh it was sooooo dry and caked on. DISGUSTING! So I threw away her undies and made her sit in the warm water to get her bum clean. Then I went back and did scriptures and prayers with the boys and told them they had 5 minutes until they needed to leave for the bus. At this time it was 8:00 time to get on my weekly conference call with our Europe marketing staff. I got on the call then started unloading the dishwasher. For some reason the top shelf didn't get clean at all so I had to reload them to the bottom and start the dishwasher again. At this time I realized that it was 8:07 and the boys were late so I told them it was time to go and they needed to hurry only to realize that Luke didn't have his shoes, jacket or backpack like Tayson. We rushed and he ran his little behind off to make it to the bus. At this time I realized it was quiet and that Claire was in the bath....oh no! I ran as fast as I could back to the bathroom but I was too late Sophie was sitting in the bath fully dressed playing. So I pulled her out and took off her clothes and diaper and put her back in. I tried really hard to pay attention to my call while I listened for the girls in the bath and put on my makeup. They finished their baths before I got done with my call so I had to get them both out and dressed (or redressed) and still get myself dressed. It was finally 8:30 and Meggan got there so I could finish my call and get ready then off to work. phew.

Peace and Quiet

On Friday afternoon Todd and his mom took the kids out on the boat while Sophie was napping so I stayed home for some peace and quiet. They were gone for about 3 hours. I put on my iPod and cleaned the entire house and then when Sophie woke up we ran a few errands. Then on Saturday Todd and his mom took all the kids to the fish store while Sophie was napping so once again I volunteered to stay home with her. I opted to finish the last 2 loads of laundry, do the dishes and finally read my book for a few minutes.

The funny part is that even though I didn't nap or rest really it was so great to have the house to myself to get everything done I wanted to. It was nice to not have to find extra time on Saturday to clean when I would rather be spending time as a family. I love having a clean house and I don't mind cleaning it especially when I can rock out to some music and not worry about what my kids are doing or trying to keep them busy with chores of their own. I think it's fun when we all clean the house together (it takes twice as long but it's fun to watch the kids clean) but it was so nice to just be alone doing simple tasks thinking and enjoying time to myself.

Me I want a Hula Hoop

Tonight we had a mother's and daughters date for Relief Society so I took Claire with me. It was so much fun. There were hula hoops out - which Claire LOVED!!! She kept singing "me I want a hula hoop". I loved watching her try to do it. She never got it to go around more than once and at one point was actually spinning herself while holding the hula hoop. Here are some pictures and a video of her.

practicing

the contest

I love my sweet girl

On a side note: tonight Todd put Claire to bed. If we don't lock her door she keeps coming out over and over for hours. Tonight he forgot to lock her door and while I was folding laundry I heard her door open and I said to Todd ... "did you forget to lock her door?" but then she didn't come in our room. A few minutes later I walked by her room and saw that she had opened her door, locked it and gone back in to bed. She has done this one other time that I know of. She cracks me up.

The Joy of Motherhood

Today at Stake Conference my good friend offered to take Sophie off my hands while she slept. Ah heaven...only 3 kids to try to keep quiet for 2 hours.

When I would look to make sure Sophie was behaving and still fast asleep I saw my friend holding and cuddling her, then her son was holding her, they were so sweet and I could tell how much they were enjoying holding sweet baby Sophie.

It reminded me of the day Tayson was born. Another couple from our prenatal class were at the hospital and we thought it was so fun we were having our babies on the same day when we saw the husband. We found out as we were on our way to the delivery room that there had been complications and they had lost their baby. The next day my friend came to my hospital room with flowers for me (like I deserved the flowers at that point!!!). I had no idea what to do so I just handed her Tayson and we sat there crying for her loss. I will never forget the way I felt at that moment.

Since then I have had friends who have struggled to have children, lost children, adopted children, had children and I've had 3 more of my own. The feelings I had today reminded me so strongly to enjoy every minute I have with the sweet spirits I've been blessed with. I hope that when people see me holding Sophie they see how much I love it and I look like my friend did today instead of looking stressed, annoyed, and tired.

I love being a mom it is my greatest joy!